Air Bunny Friends

First and most importantly, you need to understand that I call air quotes “air bunnies”. I just put quotation marks around the phrase I use for quotation marks and I’m definitely having a giggle. Those of you who watched FRIENDS can picture Joey using them incorrectly when he said, “Oops!” If you’ve never seen it, you have permission to put down the book and go watch the clip on YouTube real quick. (I promise. This is going somewhere. Eventually.)

My boss, who I adore, was telling me about her tight group of people that became more than coworkers. She pointed to a collage of people around her in a photo and I felt this huge pang. I made a remark about how even after three schools, I didn’t have that. She looked so surprised and said, “Um. Think about that crew you did that outing with the other night.” I said, “Yeah but only two of those people are even friends, much less close friends.” I told her that I have never had a pack. I’ve had a close friend or two and then lots of mostly friends, but never a pack of five or six people I was super close with at work. She told me I was overthinking it.

I got home and one of the two people I’d say I’m close with at work had sent me a Willow Tree figurine holding flowers—forget-me-nots. She sent it in remembrance of my brother-in-law who passed away just over a week ago. In another package there was a friendship bracelet. It had no gift tag and my close friend said it wasn’t from her. Someone, no idea who, sent me a simple bracelet with a card about how the thread of friendship is what holds us together.

I’m a pretty forgetful person in general, but I constantly forget lessons I share with others around me. A stupid rift separated my middle/high school best church friend. Cancer took my elementary best friend. My closest friend from high school and I no longer speak because when I spoke truth to her, she said I’d never been a friend to her and we haven’t spoken since, so more than ten years of friendship went down the drain. I have lots of “closeish” friends from growing up but no best friends. I have two close friends at work right now. One from my first school where I worked for over ten years. ONE! It’s hard to see social media constantly showing off all the friendship types others have that I don’t.

But that lesson I forget that I somehow remember to tell others? Other peoples’ social media isn’t your life. I might not have a group of twelve bff’s from fifth grade that stood by me at my wedding, but I do have people who love me. I might not have a group of six teacher besties who call me up for drinks every other weekend, but I do have people who love me.

Even more important to remember, and thus what I forget more often because I forget the important stuff most, is that I have a KING who loves me. I’m the daughter of a King. Out of the whole universe, He decided there needed to be one of me. Me. And all of my too-loud-obnoxious-bossy-creative-smart-mouthed-attitude-ridden-imperfect-broken self. He seeks my heart and desires for me to turn to Him first. He probably also wonders why I focus so much on what friendships I don’t have instead of focusing more on who I can be a friend to. He reminds me of that a lot, but as we’ve learned…. I forget things easily.

Proverbs 18:24 reminds us that “There are ‘friends’ who destroy each other, but a real friend sticks closer than a brother.” Notice that the writer put air bunnies around the word friends. Can you think of someone who is more like a “friend” with air bunnies instead of a true friend? Previously in the chapter, it also warns us that it’s harder to mend friendships than to breach fortified castle walls. We can easily look at the negatives, but I think it’s important to remember that it doesn’t say “If you’re nice, a friend will stick closer than a brother” or anything like that. We can add it to Proverbs 17:17 which says, “A friend is always loyal, and a brother is born to help in time of need.” So if a brother is born to help and a real friend sticks closer than that, what does that mean for how we are to act as a friend?

As you pray today, think about:

-Have you thanked God for the people in your life that are your closest friends? Have you prayed deeply over their lives and needs?

-Where has God protected you from an air bunny “friendship”?

-Who around you could use a real friend? How can you move from being an air bunny friend for someone else to being a true friend to them?